The Blessing of a
Christian Home
Book of Ephesians
5:22-33
Before there was sin
in the world God had already established the family.
Before there was a
Church in the world, Satan had already made plans to destroy each and
every family.
One of the greatest
truths in all the Scripture was the passage we ended with last week.
Eph 5:21 Submitting
yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
In this passage the
word "fear" is just like we understand it. We can expect to
see the wrath of God if we ignore His commandments!
Fear is the passion
of our nature which causes us to try to provide for our own security,
expecting some evil to come.
It is the very next
passage that we will see the first example of submitting to one
another and it is the marriage.
The Bible is
specific, a legal marriage is between one man and one woman, for
life.
Note: This does not
include those who claim an opposite gender. We are the gender we were
born with!
God does not make
mistakes!
Psa 139:16 Thine
eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all
my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as
yet there was none of them.
The marriage is to
be the greatest example of the marriage of the Church to our Savior,
the Lord Jesus Christ!
Rev 19:7 Let us be
glad and rejoice, and give honour to him: for the marriage of the
Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready.
Rev 19:8 And to her
was granted that she should be arrayed in fine linen, clean and
white: for the fine linen is the righteousness of saints.
Rev 19:9 And he
saith unto me, Write, Blessed are they which are called unto the
marriage supper of the Lamb. And he saith unto me, These are the true
sayings of God.
Many of us have
failed while we were out in the world but knowing the Lord we should
not allow this to happen again.
The Lord Jesus said
we were ignorant of the truth of God and God is willing to forgive
even this sin if we ask, but we will still endure the hardships of
this broken relationship.
Thank goodness for
the "Grace" of God that began with His "love"
then His "mercy".
When we submit to
one another, we are surrendering to the power, to the will, and to
the authority of another!
It should be obvious
that these Scriptures describe the perfect marriage and the perfect
family, but these must still be our goals.
*****Eph 5:22
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
We must consider
that "submission" is in fact the will of God and submission
begins as we submit to the Lord.
We must always
remember, God is a God of order!
We should remember
what happened after Adam was disobedient to God being influenced by
Eve. Adam allowed the love for his wife to come between him and the
love for his Heavenly Father. This is the first step to a broken
marriage!
Gen 3:16 Unto the
woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception;
in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to
thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
The wife is to be in
submission to their "own" husband, unless where God
forbids. They are never to be in submission to anyone else as they
submit to their own husband.
The obedience of the
wife is at the same time the obedience paid to Jesus Christ!
Col 3:18 Wives,
submit yourselves unto your own husbands, "as it is fit in the
Lord".
No one, wife or
husband, is to come between us and Christ!
Which means only
Christ the Lord is to come between husband and wife!
In case you are not
listening, these are the commandments of God and not suggestions!
If we are walking
according to our Christian walk, as we have been learning throughout
this great book of the Bible, "we will be walking down the path
the Lord has chosen for us". It is only then we will know to
take on a wife or a husband. It is only then that we can experience a
loving and peaceful relationship under the watchful eyes of the Lord
and be a benefit and blessing to Him!
Only after we have
experienced the love of the Lord will we be capable to show that love
to another human being!
Col 3:1 If ye then
be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ
sitteth on the right hand of God.
As the woman loves
the Lord, she can please the Lord if she submits herself to her
husband!
In other words, God
instructs all wives to walk in the "spirit" of submission
with their husbands!
We are all to please
the Lord so, the Christian wives are to set their lives upon pleasing
the Lord and then pleasing their husbands.
We should understand
the Christian marriage is a partnership of two, one man and one
woman, in the service of the Lord!
1Co 11:11
Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman
without the man, in the Lord.
1Co 11:12 For as
the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but
all things of God.
Each Christian
family is to be the beginnings of a godly society!
We must also
completely understand that God sees both the man and the woman as
equals!
Gal 3:26 For ye are
all the children of God by faith in Christ Jesus.
Gal 3:27 For as
many of you as have been baptized into Christ have put on Christ.
Gal 3:28 There is
neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is
neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.
This marriage of
this man and this woman is to be God's example of His relationship to
the Church!
*****Eph 5:23 For
the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of
the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Eph 5:24 Therefore
as the church is subject unto Christ, "so let the wives be to
their own husbands in every thing".
As God is speaking
of the man being the head of the woman, God is speaking of function
and order within the organization of the Church.
Every working
organization will have a head and Jesus Christ is the Head of the
church just as He is to be the Head of each family!
Just as Jesus Christ
is the Savior of every believer, He is also the Savior of the Church!
The husband and wife
relationship will work when they both desire "to please"
rather than a desire "to be pleased"!
The true husband
will govern his own household in the image of Jesus Christ who
governs the Church!
The husband and wife
relationship that is not working well, will also restrict their
prayer life.
1Pe 3:7 Likewise,
ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour
unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together
of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
The Christian
husband and Christian wife relationship that is going sour, can also
ruin the testimony of the Christian family.
Tit 2:5 To be
discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own
husbands, "that the word of God be not blasphemed".
We must completely
understand, that none of these things show that God says the woman is
inferior to the man. These things all mean that God is a God of order
and discipline.
In fact, the true
family will rest upon that godly wife!
Pro 31:10 Who can
find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
Pro 31:11 The heart
of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no
need of spoil.
Pro 31:12 She will
do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
There can never be
two heads in any organization for that organization to work properly,
and the family will not work without order and neither will the
Church that the Lord built with His own blood!
*****Eph 5:25
Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and
gave himself for it;
How does God love
each of us? God has a selfless and unselfish love for each of us.
A giving love!
A sacrificial love.
A love of the mind
as well as a love from the heart.
A love of
commitment.
God's love, is a
love that commits itself to the will of each believer.
This is the same
love that the husband is to have for the wife!
This is also the
love the Lord has for the true church, which is the object of our
Savior's love!
The true church is
made up of those who "were" defiled until they realized
they needed a Savior!
By nature, the
church is useless but, by God's "grace" and the Holy
Spirit, the church is a major force against the evils and the
immorality of this world. "All because of the Father's love for
His Dear Son, and the Son's love for us all".
Joh 3:16 For God
"so loved" the world, that he gave his only begotten Son,
that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have
everlasting life.
Jesus Christ loves
His church!
The same standard of
the husbands love for his wife is the love Jesus Christ has for His
church!
We must remember the
order of creation. The woman was made from man, after man, and for
the man.
It is the duty of
each man to love his own wife as Jesus Christ loves His Church.
***Eph 5:26 That he
might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Eph 5:27 That he
might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or
wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without
blemish.
The husband's love
must be set apart and cleansed, just as the church.
To sanctify means to
be set apart.
1) When a man has
asked a woman for her hand in marriage, "then he must set
himself apart" for her and her alone!
This means making an
unbroken commitment to the wife he has chosen!
When the wife
accepts her husband then she must also set herself apart, only for
him.
Those that refuse to
do so are already in a defiled marriage!
Just as the love the
Lord has for the Bride of Christ, the husbands love, must be a
sacrificial love!
2) Again, just as
the Lord, the Lamb of God, the husband must remain without spot or
wrinkle.
Spots would be abuse
and mistreatment, loose behavior, immorality and other such things.
Wrinkles would be
temper and reaction to temper, broken promises, neglect, selfishness,
and rejection.
It is obvious that
most every marriage is dependent on the love of the husband!
Very few wives would
reject such love as a love that was like that of Christ for His
church!
Again, what was the
prayer of Jesus Christ?
Joh 17:16 They are
not of the world, even as I am not of the world.
Joh 17:17 Sanctify
them through thy truth: thy word is truth.
Joh 17:18 As thou
hast sent me into the world, even so have I also sent them into the
world.
Joh 17:19 And for
their sakes I sanctify myself, that they also might be sanctified
through the truth.
A marriage that is
washed in the truth of the Word of God has the best chance of being a
lasting marriage!
Therefore, God is so
critical of divorce in such a marriage as two Christians in a
marriage!
The Lord Jesus
Christ will one day soon present a perfect church to His Father in
Heaven as His bride and as Christians we will one day have reach this
perfection.
This must be the
goal of marriage, that the husband can present himself with that
perfect everlasting partner in life!
Jud 1:21 Keep
yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord
Jesus Christ unto eternal life.
Those who cannot
love themselves have no business claiming to love someone else!
*****Eph 5:28 So
ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his
wife loveth himself.
Eph 5:29 For no man
ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even
as the Lord the church:
We should see that
the word "So" refers to the previous verse.
If that wife has not
become a living breathing part of that husband, then to say he does
not love her is to say that he does not love himself.
So, becomes the sin
of that man!
This of course means
that he is to love and cherish and provide for his wife, just as much
as he loves and cherishes and provides for himself!
It is obvious that a
marriage is a big step to take for every couple and these things
should be taken into consideration.
It is also just as
obvious that a marriage that is washed in the Word of God is a
precious and wonderful partnership!
That word "nourish"
means to feed, clothe, nurture, and look after that wife until she is
the perfect wife.
That word "cherish"
means to hold her ever so dear within his heart, to always be warm
toward her with tenderness and care, affection and appreciation.
These words mean
that it is a great obligation for a man to take a wife!
We could wonder then
how can there be so many divorces in the Christian community?
It makes it easier
to understand these words of the Apostle Paul:
1Co 7:1 Now
concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: "It is good for
a man not to touch a woman".
1Co 7:2
Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife,
and let every woman have her own husband.
1Co 7:7 "For I
would that all men were even as I myself". But every man hath
his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after
that.
1Co 7:8 I say
therefore to the unmarried and widows, "It is good for them if
they abide even as I".
That wife must be
treated as a special gift of God!
What did Jesus say
about divorce?
Mat 19:8 He saith
unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you
to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.
Mat 19:9 And I say
unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for
fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso
marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
Mat 19:10 His
disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife,
it is not good to marry.
Mat 19:11 But he
said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom
it is given.
The marriage must be
a sacred bond between one man and one woman, who have already given
themselves to the Lord Jesus Christ or there will be too many paths
to failure!
*****Eph 5:30 For
we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
Eph 5:31 For this
cause shall a man leave his father and mother, "and shall be
joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh".
What is the perfect
marriage? The husband has become "one" with his wife and
the wife has become "one" with her husband!
Gen 5:1 This is the
book of the generations of Adam. In the day that God created man, in
the likeness of God made he him;
Gen 5:2 Male and
female created he them; and blessed them, "and called their name
Adam", in the day when they were created.
This is the marriage
that God first created by Jesus Christ! The very first marriage were
one man and one woman who were one!
To be joined, is to
be glued together with the substance of God's Word that cannot be
broken!
This should be our
goal today!
This man and this
woman should be so close together in their relationship, that those
that see them see only one!
This union is to be
much more than just living together and sharing each other’s body!
The physical union
of a marriage cannot reach its ultimate fulness without knowing the
mercy and the love of God, as we see in these Scriptures.
This is a union that
will share life with each other and then eternal life in God's
Heaven, even though there is no marriage in Heaven we will know as we
were known.
Mar_12:25 For when
they shall rise from the dead, they neither marry, nor are given in
marriage; but are as the angels which are in heaven.
The angels do not
marry. In Heaven we will not be angels but there are no marriages in
Heaven because we will be joined to the Lord, a much higher union
than even the perfect marriage.
This does not mean
we will not know each other!
1Co 13:12 For now
we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: "now I
know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known".
You see the
spiritual union of those in a godly marriage will always remain, at
least this is what I believe. This is the thing that can only be done
by those wonderful hands of God.
The greatest thing
in the world is to know the Lord Jesus Christ, our Savior and our God
and know that we will have life abundantly here and in Heaven with
Him!
Then these two, who
are joined in marriage, cannot know true life without the Lord, here
and in Heaven!
They will submit
themselves together in the fear of the Lord vs21!
Day by day they will
set out to nourish each other vs29!
They will work
together to become a living part of each other vs30!
If the Lord so
compares the godly marriage to the marriage of the church to Himself,
how can these things not be true.
The Lord says, I
will never leave you nor forsake you.
If the Lord
deliberately shares spiritual things with us all and truly molds one
man to one woman into one flesh spiritually, then this to is one of
the greatest gifts of God.
All these things are
to teach us just how much Jesus Christ loves His Church!
Mat 19:6 Wherefore
they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined
together, let not man put asunder.
*****Eph 5:32 This
is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
The true church,
where the Lord Jesus Christ is the Head, is in an intimate union with
Christ Himself!
The seat of worship
is the heart of the believer!
Mar_12:30 And thou
shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy
soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the
first commandment.
The union of the
Lord Jesus with His church began when He took on the human nature and
made it His own!
The Lord became
flesh and dwelt among us and this has continued, with His union with
the church!
The trouble in the
marriage and the trouble in the church begins when either spouse
becomes unwilling to be bound together by the Holy Spirit.
1Co 6:17 But he
that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit.
It is this same
Spirit that this man and this woman is to be joined in a fruitful
marriage!
But nevertheless.
*****Eph 5:33
Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even
as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
The true marriage is
a spiritual union that can only come by the hands of God!
Mat 19:10 His
disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife,
it is not good to marry.
Mat 19:11 But he
said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom
it is given.
More than two people
just agreeing to live with each other as we see so much of today.
More than a natural
affection or infatuation.
More than a piece of
paper or a legal contract.
Marriage comes first
from a commitment to the Lord in a union unlike any other union on
the face of this earth!
Marriage is to be an
example of the tender, sacrificial love that the Lord has for each of
those who call upon His name!
The Christian home
is to have an atmosphere of the Lord.
The Christian home
is to be managed by the Lord.
The Christian home
is not a partnership of two but of three, the husband, the wife, and
Jesus Christ!
Amen
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