David's Family
2 Samuel 13; 14
Last week we began to see the results of what happens when we go against the Word of God. King David had committed grievous sin and for a long time refused to repent and even tried to hide his sin from the world.
God is not pleased when we do not repent immediately after committing any sin.
A sin is anything we do that goes against the Word of God.
In fact, sin is also anything we go ahead and do that our conscience tells us we should not do!
Already David had to witnessed the death of a son, but when God removes that "hedge of protection" from around his children, things just do not go very well in this world we live in.
If we are truly saved we cannot loose our salvation!
David did still get to see that child when he got to Heaven, and we will also get to see our own loved ones, who have gone on before us, but life in this world will still loose some it's joy because of our sin, and the longer we go unrepentant the more sorrow we will have!
War was over with Ammon, but warfare within the life of David and his family was just beginning!
When that evil thing called "temptation" raises it's ugly head, we need to immediately flee to some other place, at least in our minds.
Sin never has a happy ending!
If we "could count the cost" of that sin before hand, we would find that a few moments of pleasure is never worth the price we will pay in our lives and in the lives of our loved ones!
Righteousness means doing things the right way.
The right way is God's way and God's way, is truly the way of life!
*****2Sa 13:1 And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.
It can truly be said that God does not hide anything from us in His Word!
It would have been easy to have left these things out of the Bible that God gave us.
I have said before, the Bible was written for believers.
We would never understand God's "Mercy" and God's "Grace" without seeing these truths of the Old Testament!
Absalom was King David's 3rd born son but Absalom was born of Maacah who was the royal princess and daughter of Talami the King of Geshur.
Absalom was also born in Hebron and Hebron was the main city of Judah and the first capitol of King David.
Judah was the backbone of Israel and had been the leader of the tribes of Israel from the days of Moses.
All these things will have more meaning as we study these scriptures.
We should also keep in mind as long as Satan only knew that the Messiah would come from a descendant of Abraham, he had few options but with the covenant with David, Satan knew the Messiah would at sometime come from this family and he began his ruthless attack on David and his family.
David had been under the protecting hand of God up until this thing with Bathsheba and Uriah's death, but God had lifted that hedge of protection and Satan began his attack, with his goal to stop the coming Messiah.
What had God told the Serpent (Satan)?
Gen 3:15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; "it shall bruise thy head", and thou shalt bruise his heel.
But Absalom had a beautiful sister, the "fairest" in all the land!
King David's first born son was Amnon and all things being normal, most of Israel would assume that Amnon would be the next king of Israel but Absalom also had this on his mind because he was born of royalty.
Amnon was a wicked young man!
Another thing we should consider, is that David had many wives and "polygamy" does not allow for a true family relationship!
God has never authorized "polygamy"!
*****2Sa 13:2 And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do any thing to her.
Tamar was a virgin and unmarried daughters of royalty were kept secluded from the company of men unless in the presence of many witnesses.
The few times that Amnon had seen Tamar, Amnon had developed a deep passion for her but he knew he could never have her.
It is said that a man never sees the worst in himself until he sees it in his own son!
King David had not set a very good example for his sons in this thing with Bathsheba and Uriah.
In a real sense, Tamar was Amnon's sister and he should have turned that lust into love and her protection but Satan always has his own little helpers.
Sometimes our so-called friends are truly our greatest enemy!
*****2Sa 13:3 But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother: and Jonadab was a very subtil man.
2Sa 13:4 And he said unto him, Why art thou, being the king's son, lean from day to day? wilt thou not tell me? And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister.
2Sa 13:5 And Jonadab said unto him, Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come, and give me meat, and dress the meat in my sight, that I may see it, and eat it at her hand.
2Sa 13:6 So Amnon lay down, and made himself sick: and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister come, and make me a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat at her hand.
Amnon, as the first born son of the king, could have gotten pretty much anything he desired but he turned all that desire toward Tamar and was obsessed with his own sister.
Amnon was repeating this part of his father's sin and he makes his own father a part of that sin, by using him to send Tamar to him!
King David gives in to his son believing the things he had said.
King David was setting aside his own rules in bad judgement.
*****2Sa 13:8 So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house; and he was laid down. And she took flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes "in his sight", and did bake the cakes.
Does God really hate some of the things we do?
The Bible says:
Pro 6:16 These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:
Pro 6:17 A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
Pro 6:18 "An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations", feet that be swift in running to mischief,
Pro 6:19 A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.
There are some hearts that are so bad that they are ever inventing some evil thing and Amnon had such a heart.
While Tamar made those cakes, Amnon's passion raged, "as he was watching the movements of his sister" and was making his evil plan to take her.
*****2Sa 13:9 And she took a pan, and poured them out before him; but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him.
2Sa 13:10 And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother.
2Sa 13:11 And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister.
There are many beautiful women in this world. This gives them no reason to brag of that fact, but they must also realize they should always be on guard for their own safety.
There are also many evil Amnon's in this world and this will always be true!
2Ti 3:13 But evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived.
That phrase "Come lie with me" came only after he had thrown his arms around her to stop her from escaping him.
And she responded.
*****2Sa 13:12 And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; "for no such thing ought to be done in Israel": do not thou "this folly".
Tamar at least knew something of God's commandments. Incest was strictly forbidden in the law of God!
Lev 18:9 The nakedness of thy sister, the daughter of thy father, or daughter of thy mother, whether she be born at home, or born abroad, even their nakedness thou shalt not uncover.
Lev 20:17 And if a man shall take his sister, his father's daughter, or his mother's daughter, and see her nakedness, and she see his nakedness; it is a wicked thing; and they shall be cut off in the sight of their people: he hath uncovered his sister's nakedness; he shall bear his iniquity.
There are men in our world who are just like Amnon and void of understanding such things as this.
That word folly means that Tamar knew this was a crime of wickedness.
Tamar was telling Amnon what was written in the Bible, as she quoted from the Book of Genesis.
Gen 34:7 And the sons of Jacob came out of the field when they heard it: and the men were grieved, and they were very wroth, because he had wrought folly in Israel in lying with Jacob's daughter; "which thing ought not to be done".
Amnon rejected the Word if God.
*****2Sa 13:13 And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee.
2Sa 13:14 Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her.
Tamar asked for consideration because her reputation would be tarnished and her character ruined all her days and she was very young.
Amnon ignored this plea.
Tamar asked Amnon to consider his own reputation because as the legitimate heir to the thrown of Israel, it was foolish to throw it all away for a few moments of pleasure.
Amnon ignored this truth.
Tamar ask Amnon to stop what he was doing and talk to his earthly father the King, he might even allow this thing.
Amnon ignored all these things and continued by forcibly raping his sister, who was unwilling.
Then Amnon's passion turned into hatred.
*****2Sa 13:15 Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.
2Sa 13:16 And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her.
2Sa 13:17 Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her.
2Sa 13:18 And she had a garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king's daughters that were virgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after her.
2Sa 13:19 And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying.
After Amnon's passion was filled, the things that would follow this act of wickedness began to sink in and Amnon's love turned to hate.
Amnon had really never had love for his sister!
Lust is not love in any form or fashion!
Lust is a sinful longing, "that inward sin" which causes us to fall away from God.
Rom 1:21 Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
Rom 1:22 Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,
Lusts are simply the objects of desire!
Mar 4:18 And these are they which are sown among thorns; such as hear the word,
Mar 4:19 And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.
What is love?
Love is the unselfish, loyal, and a real concern for the wellbeing of another.
Love is the more excellent way!
1Co 12:31 But covet earnestly the best gifts: and yet shew I unto you "a more excellent way".
1Co 13:13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; "but the greatest of these is charity".
Amnon had had no love for Tamar and was no longer filled with passion at the sight of his sister!
What Amnon had done had been in secret but unlike his father with Bathsheba, Amnon hated Tamar so much he openly exposed Tamar, and tried to show that it was she who had been the aggressor and who was at fault.
To keep this thing a secret would have been much better for her!
I'm sure Tamar shuddered when Amnon told his servants to get "this thing" out of my house and "out of my sight".
But Tamar had an older brother.
*****2Sa 13:20 And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house.
Absalom knew that his father King David had sent Tamar to the house of Amnon and with this knowledge of his sister, Absalom began to plot his on revenge but not just for this one reason.
Absalom convinced his sister to keep this thing a secret and not tell her father, the king.
It was her father who had sent her to Amnon. so Tamar listened to her brother.
Amnon would not allow this thing to be kept a secret.
*****2Sa 13:21 But when king David heard of all these things, he was very wroth.
Just as this secret thing could not be hidden, we can also be sure that the secret thing of Bathsheba and Uriah was no longer hidden!
What did King David do?
He got mad!
King David got angry at Amnon but did nothing about it and no one else did.
It was King David's duty as a father to see that this evil doer was punished but he did nothing.
It was King David's duty as King and judge of Israel to see that this evil doer be punished but he did nothing.
It is doubtful that Amnon's servant would have testified against him and there had been no eye witnesses to this crime.
This began a war between David's children.
This was the main reason that virgins and unmarried women were not to be left alone in the presence of men, David's own rule.
But David had sent his daughter to Amnon and held sole responsibility to punish his son, yet he did nothing.
Here again the judge could not properly judge because of his own sin!
Why, we might ask?
King David had a guilty conscience and the memory of his own sin shut him down!
The Law said:
Deu 22:28 If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found;
Deu 22:29 Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.
This what Tamar was trying to explain to Amnon.
But the Law also said this:
Lev 18:9 The nakedness of thy sister, the daughter of thy father, or daughter of thy mother, whether she be born at home, or born abroad, even their nakedness thou shalt not uncover.
Absalom also did not confront his brother Amnon, but plotted his own revenge.
*****2Sa 13:22 And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.
2Sa 13:23 And it came to pass after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baalhazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the king's sons.
2Sa 13:24 And Absalom came to the king, and said, Behold now, thy servant hath sheepshearers; let the king, I beseech thee, and his servants go with thy servant.
2Sa 13:25 And the king said to Absalom, Nay, my son, let us not all now go, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And he pressed him: howbeit he would not go, but blessed him.
A sheep-shearing feast was a grand occasion in Israel.
Absalom probably knew the his father David would not attend but he ask him any way.
If the king accepted this invitation it would expected of Absalom to provided not only for the king but all that would come with him which would be his servants and his personal body guards among many others, so the king refused to go but blessed Absalom for his offer.
Absalom was really trying to hide his true intentions, which he accomplished.
This is the main trait of Satan!
*****2Sa 13:26 Then said Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said unto him, Why should he go with thee?
2Sa 13:27 But Absalom pressed him, that he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him.
King David may have had a few suspicions but he did allow Amnon to attend along with all his other sons.
Again using bad judgement!
Now Absalom's plan went into action but he would not dirty his own hands and used the hands of his loyal servants.
Again we see another thing the child had learned from the parent!
*****2Sa 13:28 Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant.
2Sa 13:29 And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose, and every man gat him up upon his mule, and fled.
At this time the remaining sons of David fled because they feared for their own lives thinking Absalom was assuring himself to be the next king of Israel.
The mules were used because King David had chosen the mule to symbolize royalty in his kingdom.
1Ki 1:33 The king also said unto them, Take with you the servants of your lord, and cause Solomon my son "to ride upon mine own mule", and bring him down to Gihon:
*****2Sa 13:30 And it came to pass, while they were in the way, that tidings came to David, saying, Absalom hath slain all the king's sons, and there is not one of them left.
2Sa 13:31 Then the king arose, and tare his garments, and lay on the earth; and all his servants stood by with their clothes rent.
2Sa 13:32 And Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother, answered and said, Let not my lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king's sons; for Amnon only is dead: "for by the appointment of Absalom this hath been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar".
2Sa 13:33 Now therefore let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king's sons are dead: for Amnon only is dead.
King David realized that again he had been used by his own children to do evil things.
Just as Amnon had used his father to get access to Tamar, Absalom had used his father to get access to Amnon.
This act of vengeance could have been stopped had King David taken control of this thing of his daughter from the beginning!
Jonadab knew all along that King David's other sons had not been the target of Absalom but had hid this thing from the King for these two years.
Remember this was supposedly Amnon's good friend, but in actuality, he was only someone who was jealous of all of David's sons and also a very evil young man.
Satan hates all our young people and does everything he can to destroy them!
And Absalom fled to his grandfather.
*****2Sa 13:34 But Absalom fled. And the young man that kept the watch lifted up his eyes, and looked, and, behold, there came much people by the way of the hill side behind him.
2Sa 13:35 And Jonadab said unto the king, Behold, the king's sons come: as thy servant said, so it is.
2Sa 13:36 And it came to pass, as soon as he had made an end of speaking, that, behold, the king's sons came, and lifted up their voice and wept: and the king also and all his servants wept very sore.
2Sa 13:37 But Absalom fled, and went to Talmai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day.
2Sa 13:38 So Absalom fled, and went to Geshur, and was there three years.
Talmai was Absalom's grandfather and ruler of a city state named Geshur.
Absalom had ran, fearing now for his own life but he would only be safe in Geshur because David had signed an agreement with this king for safety and it was sealed by the marriage of King David to Maacah this kings daughter.
This was not a good reason to get married but even Solomon would use this same means of peace over and over again.
Absalom stayed with his grandfather for 3 years but King David longed to see his son yet still lacked forgiveness.
*****2Sa 13:39 And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.
We can see that the death of one son, Amnon, had faded by this time and the son that was alive Absalom, was sorely missed.
No doubt King David blamed himself for all these things and he had not yet forgiven himself though God had.
But there was another political enemy of David, who was watching closely these failures of King David.
*****2Sa 14:1 Now Joab the son of Zeruiah perceived that the king's heart was toward Absalom.
2Sa 14:2 And Joab sent to Tekoah, and fetched thence a wise woman, and said unto her, I pray thee, feign thyself to be a mourner, and put on now mourning apparel, and anoint not thyself with oil, but be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead:
2Sa 14:3 And come to the king, and speak on this manner unto him. So Joab put the words in her mouth.
2Sa 14:4 And when the woman of Tekoah spake to the king, she fell on her face to the ground, and did obeisance, and said, Help, O king.
2Sa 14:5 And the king said unto her, What aileth thee? And she answered, I am indeed a widow woman, and mine husband is dead.
2Sa 14:6 And thy handmaid had two sons, and they two strove together in the field, and there was none to part them, but the one smote the other, and slew him.
2Sa 14:7 And, behold, the whole family is risen against thine handmaid, and they said, Deliver him that smote his brother, that we may kill him, for the life of his brother whom he slew; and we will destroy the heir also: and so they shall quench my coal which is left, and shall not leave to my husband neither name nor remainder upon the earth.
2Sa 14:8 And the king said unto the woman, Go to thine house, and I will give charge concerning thee.
2Sa 14:9 And the woman of Tekoah said unto the king, My lord, O king, the iniquity be on me, and on my father's house: and the king and his throne be guiltless.
2Sa 14:10 And the king said, Whosoever saith ought unto thee, bring him to me, and he shall not touch thee any more.
2Sa 14:11 Then said she, I pray thee, let the king remember the LORD thy God, that thou wouldest not suffer the revengers of blood to destroy any more, lest they destroy my son. And he said, As the LORD liveth, there shall not one hair of thy son fall to the earth.
2Sa 14:12 Then the woman said, Let thine handmaid, I pray thee, speak one word unto my lord the king. And he said, Say on.
2Sa 14:13 And the woman said, Wherefore then hast thou thought such a thing against the people of God? for the king doth speak this thing as one which is faulty, in that the king doth not fetch home again his banished.
2Sa 14:14 For we must needs die, and are as water spilt on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again; neither doth God respect any person: yet doth he devise means, that his banished be not expelled from him.
2Sa 14:15 Now therefore that I am come to speak of this thing unto my lord the king, it is because the people have made me afraid: and thy handmaid said, I will now speak unto the king; it may be that the king will perform the request of his handmaid.
2Sa 14:16 For the king will hear, to deliver his handmaid out of the hand of the man that would destroy me and my son together out of the inheritance of God.
2Sa 14:17 Then thine handmaid said, The word of my lord the king shall now be comfortable: for as an angel of God, so is my lord the king to discern good and bad: therefore the LORD thy God will be with thee.
2Sa 14:18 Then the king answered and said unto the woman, Hide not from me, I pray thee, the thing that I shall ask thee. And the woman said, Let my lord the king now speak.
2Sa 14:19 And the king said, Is not the hand of Joab with thee in all this? And the woman answered and said, As thy soul liveth, my lord the king, none can turn to the right hand or to the left from ought that my lord the king hath spoken: for thy servant Joab, he bade me, and he put all these words in the mouth of thine handmaid:
2Sa 14:20 To fetch about this form of speech hath thy servant Joab done this thing: and my lord is wise, according to the wisdom of an angel of God, to know all things that are in the earth.
King David had listened intently to Nathan as he had told a story and discerned it to be from God.
Joab had hired, what could be called an actor, wise in her words, to tell another story to King David.
Nathan had brought conviction to David and that conviction had led to repentance.
This actor, this imitator, would only lead to the promotion to Joab's scheme of self-interest.
What was her argument?
1) Those that grant mercy should begin with those of their own home.
2) We all are appointed a day to die, if Absalom were to die before he was reconciled by his father, it would his father who would suffer the most and go to his own grave in grief for his own inaction of forgiveness.
3) David was not being an example of the God, he said he worshipped and trusted in.
The results.
*****2Sa 14:21 And the king said unto Joab, Behold now, I have done this thing: go therefore, bring the young man Absalom again.
2Sa 14:22 And Joab fell to the ground on his face, and bowed himself, and thanked the king: and Joab said, To day thy servant knoweth that I have found grace in thy sight, my lord, O king, in that the king hath fulfilled the request of his servant.
2Sa 14:23 So Joab arose and went to Geshur, and brought Absalom to Jerusalem.
2Sa 14:24 And the king said, Let him turn to his own house, and let him not see my face. So Absalom returned to his own house, and saw not the king's face.
King David brought Absalom back home to his own house but there was no reconciliation nor forgiveness.
Joab was disappointed in his King and Absalom became very irritated and would plot to over throw his own father.
What is the theme we should observe here?
The judge, who is also a great sinner, is unworthy to deal with other offenders!
These are the type of men who sit to judge in most of our judicial systems today and ignore the Word of God.
It is only by the Word of God that men can be judged honestly and justly!
When a guilty offender, is lawyered by an eloquent speaker, and is set free, this is in itself a great sin not only to the public but also to God!
God cautions the Church of such things.
1Co 6:1 Dare any of you, having a matter against another, "go to law before the unjust", and not before the saints?
But to most of Israel, Absalom had succeeded where his father the King had failed.
*****2Sa 14:25 But in all Israel there was none to be so much praised as Absalom for his beauty: from the sole of his foot even to the crown of his head there was no blemish in him.
2Sa 14:26 And when he polled his head, (for it was at every year's end that he polled it: because the hair was heavy on him, therefore he polled it:) he weighed the hair of his head at two hundred shekels after the king's weight.
Not only had Tamar been the fairest of all the women in Israel until marred by Amnon, Absalom was considered the fairest of all the men of Israel.
Absalom had a great physique but he had already proved he had no soul!
Absalom had a high spirit and courtly manners to go along with his good looks but lacked in truth.
Absalom make a great happening out of his haircut only once each year.
The "kings weight" would have been the heaviest of the shekel weights.
This hair would weigh somewhere between 6 and 12 pounds depending on what measurements are used.
My own calculations say near 7 and one half pounds and would have been very heavy on him for sure!
And it had now been 5 years since King David had seen his son.
*****2Sa 14:28 So Absalom dwelt two full years in Jerusalem, and saw not the king's face.
2Sa 14:29 Therefore Absalom sent for Joab, to have sent him to the king; but he would not come to him: and when he sent again the second time, he would not come.
2Sa 14:30 Therefore he said unto his servants, See, Joab's field is near mine, and he hath barley there; go and set it on fire. And Absalom's servants set the field on fire.
2Sa 14:31 Then Joab arose, and came to Absalom unto his house, and said unto him, Wherefore have thy servants set my field on fire?
2Sa 14:32 And Absalom answered Joab, Behold, I sent unto thee, saying, Come hither, that I may send thee to the king, to say, Wherefore am I come from Geshur? it had been good for me to have been there still: now therefore let me see the king's face; and if there be any iniquity in me, let him kill me.
2Sa 14:33 So Joab came to the king, and told him: and when he had called for Absalom, he came to the king, and bowed himself on his face to the ground before the king: and the king kissed Absalom.
Absalom was not afraid to resort to destruction to have his own way but Absalom also thought that Joab was on his side.
Absalom regarded himself innocent of any wrongdoing and we can also see that Absalom is now convinced that his father was weak and unable to properly rule Israel.
King David had not realized the bitterness Absalom had toward him and again he was used by his own son, to push forward his evil agenda.
King David reinstated Absalom, giving the appearance to all of Israel that he would be chosen to be the next king.
King David again overlooks Absalom's guiltiness, therefore condoning the murder of Amnon, his own son!
In all these things, King David opens the door for Absalom to be the next king and Absalom takes full advantage of all these things and despises his own father.
And this was the beginning of rebellion and civil war in Israel, by David's own family!
Questions?
Let's Pray!
2 Samuel 13; 14
Last week we began to see the results of what happens when we go against the Word of God. King David had committed grievous sin and for a long time refused to repent and even tried to hide his sin from the world.
God is not pleased when we do not repent immediately after committing any sin.
A sin is anything we do that goes against the Word of God.
In fact, sin is also anything we go ahead and do that our conscience tells us we should not do!
Already David had to witnessed the death of a son, but when God removes that "hedge of protection" from around his children, things just do not go very well in this world we live in.
If we are truly saved we cannot loose our salvation!
David did still get to see that child when he got to Heaven, and we will also get to see our own loved ones, who have gone on before us, but life in this world will still loose some it's joy because of our sin, and the longer we go unrepentant the more sorrow we will have!
War was over with Ammon, but warfare within the life of David and his family was just beginning!
When that evil thing called "temptation" raises it's ugly head, we need to immediately flee to some other place, at least in our minds.
Sin never has a happy ending!
If we "could count the cost" of that sin before hand, we would find that a few moments of pleasure is never worth the price we will pay in our lives and in the lives of our loved ones!
Righteousness means doing things the right way.
The right way is God's way and God's way, is truly the way of life!
*****2Sa 13:1 And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.
It can truly be said that God does not hide anything from us in His Word!
It would have been easy to have left these things out of the Bible that God gave us.
I have said before, the Bible was written for believers.
We would never understand God's "Mercy" and God's "Grace" without seeing these truths of the Old Testament!
Absalom was King David's 3rd born son but Absalom was born of Maacah who was the royal princess and daughter of Talami the King of Geshur.
Absalom was also born in Hebron and Hebron was the main city of Judah and the first capitol of King David.
Judah was the backbone of Israel and had been the leader of the tribes of Israel from the days of Moses.
All these things will have more meaning as we study these scriptures.
We should also keep in mind as long as Satan only knew that the Messiah would come from a descendant of Abraham, he had few options but with the covenant with David, Satan knew the Messiah would at sometime come from this family and he began his ruthless attack on David and his family.
David had been under the protecting hand of God up until this thing with Bathsheba and Uriah's death, but God had lifted that hedge of protection and Satan began his attack, with his goal to stop the coming Messiah.
What had God told the Serpent (Satan)?
Gen 3:15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; "it shall bruise thy head", and thou shalt bruise his heel.
But Absalom had a beautiful sister, the "fairest" in all the land!
King David's first born son was Amnon and all things being normal, most of Israel would assume that Amnon would be the next king of Israel but Absalom also had this on his mind because he was born of royalty.
Amnon was a wicked young man!
Another thing we should consider, is that David had many wives and "polygamy" does not allow for a true family relationship!
God has never authorized "polygamy"!
*****2Sa 13:2 And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do any thing to her.
Tamar was a virgin and unmarried daughters of royalty were kept secluded from the company of men unless in the presence of many witnesses.
The few times that Amnon had seen Tamar, Amnon had developed a deep passion for her but he knew he could never have her.
It is said that a man never sees the worst in himself until he sees it in his own son!
King David had not set a very good example for his sons in this thing with Bathsheba and Uriah.
In a real sense, Tamar was Amnon's sister and he should have turned that lust into love and her protection but Satan always has his own little helpers.
Sometimes our so-called friends are truly our greatest enemy!
*****2Sa 13:3 But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother: and Jonadab was a very subtil man.
2Sa 13:4 And he said unto him, Why art thou, being the king's son, lean from day to day? wilt thou not tell me? And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister.
2Sa 13:5 And Jonadab said unto him, Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come, and give me meat, and dress the meat in my sight, that I may see it, and eat it at her hand.
2Sa 13:6 So Amnon lay down, and made himself sick: and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister come, and make me a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat at her hand.
Amnon, as the first born son of the king, could have gotten pretty much anything he desired but he turned all that desire toward Tamar and was obsessed with his own sister.
Amnon was repeating this part of his father's sin and he makes his own father a part of that sin, by using him to send Tamar to him!
King David gives in to his son believing the things he had said.
King David was setting aside his own rules in bad judgement.
*****2Sa 13:8 So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house; and he was laid down. And she took flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes "in his sight", and did bake the cakes.
Does God really hate some of the things we do?
The Bible says:
Pro 6:16 These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:
Pro 6:17 A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
Pro 6:18 "An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations", feet that be swift in running to mischief,
Pro 6:19 A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.
There are some hearts that are so bad that they are ever inventing some evil thing and Amnon had such a heart.
While Tamar made those cakes, Amnon's passion raged, "as he was watching the movements of his sister" and was making his evil plan to take her.
*****2Sa 13:9 And she took a pan, and poured them out before him; but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him.
2Sa 13:10 And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother.
2Sa 13:11 And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister.
There are many beautiful women in this world. This gives them no reason to brag of that fact, but they must also realize they should always be on guard for their own safety.
There are also many evil Amnon's in this world and this will always be true!
2Ti 3:13 But evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived.
That phrase "Come lie with me" came only after he had thrown his arms around her to stop her from escaping him.
And she responded.
*****2Sa 13:12 And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; "for no such thing ought to be done in Israel": do not thou "this folly".
Tamar at least knew something of God's commandments. Incest was strictly forbidden in the law of God!
Lev 18:9 The nakedness of thy sister, the daughter of thy father, or daughter of thy mother, whether she be born at home, or born abroad, even their nakedness thou shalt not uncover.
Lev 20:17 And if a man shall take his sister, his father's daughter, or his mother's daughter, and see her nakedness, and she see his nakedness; it is a wicked thing; and they shall be cut off in the sight of their people: he hath uncovered his sister's nakedness; he shall bear his iniquity.
There are men in our world who are just like Amnon and void of understanding such things as this.
That word folly means that Tamar knew this was a crime of wickedness.
Tamar was telling Amnon what was written in the Bible, as she quoted from the Book of Genesis.
Gen 34:7 And the sons of Jacob came out of the field when they heard it: and the men were grieved, and they were very wroth, because he had wrought folly in Israel in lying with Jacob's daughter; "which thing ought not to be done".
Amnon rejected the Word if God.
*****2Sa 13:13 And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee.
2Sa 13:14 Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her.
Tamar asked for consideration because her reputation would be tarnished and her character ruined all her days and she was very young.
Amnon ignored this plea.
Tamar asked Amnon to consider his own reputation because as the legitimate heir to the thrown of Israel, it was foolish to throw it all away for a few moments of pleasure.
Amnon ignored this truth.
Tamar ask Amnon to stop what he was doing and talk to his earthly father the King, he might even allow this thing.
Amnon ignored all these things and continued by forcibly raping his sister, who was unwilling.
Then Amnon's passion turned into hatred.
*****2Sa 13:15 Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.
2Sa 13:16 And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her.
2Sa 13:17 Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her.
2Sa 13:18 And she had a garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king's daughters that were virgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after her.
2Sa 13:19 And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying.
After Amnon's passion was filled, the things that would follow this act of wickedness began to sink in and Amnon's love turned to hate.
Amnon had really never had love for his sister!
Lust is not love in any form or fashion!
Lust is a sinful longing, "that inward sin" which causes us to fall away from God.
Rom 1:21 Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
Rom 1:22 Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,
Lusts are simply the objects of desire!
Mar 4:18 And these are they which are sown among thorns; such as hear the word,
Mar 4:19 And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.
What is love?
Love is the unselfish, loyal, and a real concern for the wellbeing of another.
Love is the more excellent way!
1Co 12:31 But covet earnestly the best gifts: and yet shew I unto you "a more excellent way".
1Co 13:13 And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; "but the greatest of these is charity".
Amnon had had no love for Tamar and was no longer filled with passion at the sight of his sister!
What Amnon had done had been in secret but unlike his father with Bathsheba, Amnon hated Tamar so much he openly exposed Tamar, and tried to show that it was she who had been the aggressor and who was at fault.
To keep this thing a secret would have been much better for her!
I'm sure Tamar shuddered when Amnon told his servants to get "this thing" out of my house and "out of my sight".
But Tamar had an older brother.
*****2Sa 13:20 And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house.
Absalom knew that his father King David had sent Tamar to the house of Amnon and with this knowledge of his sister, Absalom began to plot his on revenge but not just for this one reason.
Absalom convinced his sister to keep this thing a secret and not tell her father, the king.
It was her father who had sent her to Amnon. so Tamar listened to her brother.
Amnon would not allow this thing to be kept a secret.
*****2Sa 13:21 But when king David heard of all these things, he was very wroth.
Just as this secret thing could not be hidden, we can also be sure that the secret thing of Bathsheba and Uriah was no longer hidden!
What did King David do?
He got mad!
King David got angry at Amnon but did nothing about it and no one else did.
It was King David's duty as a father to see that this evil doer was punished but he did nothing.
It was King David's duty as King and judge of Israel to see that this evil doer be punished but he did nothing.
It is doubtful that Amnon's servant would have testified against him and there had been no eye witnesses to this crime.
This began a war between David's children.
This was the main reason that virgins and unmarried women were not to be left alone in the presence of men, David's own rule.
But David had sent his daughter to Amnon and held sole responsibility to punish his son, yet he did nothing.
Here again the judge could not properly judge because of his own sin!
Why, we might ask?
King David had a guilty conscience and the memory of his own sin shut him down!
The Law said:
Deu 22:28 If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found;
Deu 22:29 Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.
This what Tamar was trying to explain to Amnon.
But the Law also said this:
Lev 18:9 The nakedness of thy sister, the daughter of thy father, or daughter of thy mother, whether she be born at home, or born abroad, even their nakedness thou shalt not uncover.
Absalom also did not confront his brother Amnon, but plotted his own revenge.
*****2Sa 13:22 And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.
2Sa 13:23 And it came to pass after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baalhazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the king's sons.
2Sa 13:24 And Absalom came to the king, and said, Behold now, thy servant hath sheepshearers; let the king, I beseech thee, and his servants go with thy servant.
2Sa 13:25 And the king said to Absalom, Nay, my son, let us not all now go, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And he pressed him: howbeit he would not go, but blessed him.
A sheep-shearing feast was a grand occasion in Israel.
Absalom probably knew the his father David would not attend but he ask him any way.
If the king accepted this invitation it would expected of Absalom to provided not only for the king but all that would come with him which would be his servants and his personal body guards among many others, so the king refused to go but blessed Absalom for his offer.
Absalom was really trying to hide his true intentions, which he accomplished.
This is the main trait of Satan!
*****2Sa 13:26 Then said Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said unto him, Why should he go with thee?
2Sa 13:27 But Absalom pressed him, that he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him.
King David may have had a few suspicions but he did allow Amnon to attend along with all his other sons.
Again using bad judgement!
Now Absalom's plan went into action but he would not dirty his own hands and used the hands of his loyal servants.
Again we see another thing the child had learned from the parent!
*****2Sa 13:28 Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant.
2Sa 13:29 And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose, and every man gat him up upon his mule, and fled.
At this time the remaining sons of David fled because they feared for their own lives thinking Absalom was assuring himself to be the next king of Israel.
The mules were used because King David had chosen the mule to symbolize royalty in his kingdom.
1Ki 1:33 The king also said unto them, Take with you the servants of your lord, and cause Solomon my son "to ride upon mine own mule", and bring him down to Gihon:
*****2Sa 13:30 And it came to pass, while they were in the way, that tidings came to David, saying, Absalom hath slain all the king's sons, and there is not one of them left.
2Sa 13:31 Then the king arose, and tare his garments, and lay on the earth; and all his servants stood by with their clothes rent.
2Sa 13:32 And Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother, answered and said, Let not my lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king's sons; for Amnon only is dead: "for by the appointment of Absalom this hath been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar".
2Sa 13:33 Now therefore let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king's sons are dead: for Amnon only is dead.
King David realized that again he had been used by his own children to do evil things.
Just as Amnon had used his father to get access to Tamar, Absalom had used his father to get access to Amnon.
This act of vengeance could have been stopped had King David taken control of this thing of his daughter from the beginning!
Jonadab knew all along that King David's other sons had not been the target of Absalom but had hid this thing from the King for these two years.
Remember this was supposedly Amnon's good friend, but in actuality, he was only someone who was jealous of all of David's sons and also a very evil young man.
Satan hates all our young people and does everything he can to destroy them!
And Absalom fled to his grandfather.
*****2Sa 13:34 But Absalom fled. And the young man that kept the watch lifted up his eyes, and looked, and, behold, there came much people by the way of the hill side behind him.
2Sa 13:35 And Jonadab said unto the king, Behold, the king's sons come: as thy servant said, so it is.
2Sa 13:36 And it came to pass, as soon as he had made an end of speaking, that, behold, the king's sons came, and lifted up their voice and wept: and the king also and all his servants wept very sore.
2Sa 13:37 But Absalom fled, and went to Talmai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day.
2Sa 13:38 So Absalom fled, and went to Geshur, and was there three years.
Talmai was Absalom's grandfather and ruler of a city state named Geshur.
Absalom had ran, fearing now for his own life but he would only be safe in Geshur because David had signed an agreement with this king for safety and it was sealed by the marriage of King David to Maacah this kings daughter.
This was not a good reason to get married but even Solomon would use this same means of peace over and over again.
Absalom stayed with his grandfather for 3 years but King David longed to see his son yet still lacked forgiveness.
*****2Sa 13:39 And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.
We can see that the death of one son, Amnon, had faded by this time and the son that was alive Absalom, was sorely missed.
No doubt King David blamed himself for all these things and he had not yet forgiven himself though God had.
But there was another political enemy of David, who was watching closely these failures of King David.
*****2Sa 14:1 Now Joab the son of Zeruiah perceived that the king's heart was toward Absalom.
2Sa 14:2 And Joab sent to Tekoah, and fetched thence a wise woman, and said unto her, I pray thee, feign thyself to be a mourner, and put on now mourning apparel, and anoint not thyself with oil, but be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead:
2Sa 14:3 And come to the king, and speak on this manner unto him. So Joab put the words in her mouth.
2Sa 14:4 And when the woman of Tekoah spake to the king, she fell on her face to the ground, and did obeisance, and said, Help, O king.
2Sa 14:5 And the king said unto her, What aileth thee? And she answered, I am indeed a widow woman, and mine husband is dead.
2Sa 14:6 And thy handmaid had two sons, and they two strove together in the field, and there was none to part them, but the one smote the other, and slew him.
2Sa 14:7 And, behold, the whole family is risen against thine handmaid, and they said, Deliver him that smote his brother, that we may kill him, for the life of his brother whom he slew; and we will destroy the heir also: and so they shall quench my coal which is left, and shall not leave to my husband neither name nor remainder upon the earth.
2Sa 14:8 And the king said unto the woman, Go to thine house, and I will give charge concerning thee.
2Sa 14:9 And the woman of Tekoah said unto the king, My lord, O king, the iniquity be on me, and on my father's house: and the king and his throne be guiltless.
2Sa 14:10 And the king said, Whosoever saith ought unto thee, bring him to me, and he shall not touch thee any more.
2Sa 14:11 Then said she, I pray thee, let the king remember the LORD thy God, that thou wouldest not suffer the revengers of blood to destroy any more, lest they destroy my son. And he said, As the LORD liveth, there shall not one hair of thy son fall to the earth.
2Sa 14:12 Then the woman said, Let thine handmaid, I pray thee, speak one word unto my lord the king. And he said, Say on.
2Sa 14:13 And the woman said, Wherefore then hast thou thought such a thing against the people of God? for the king doth speak this thing as one which is faulty, in that the king doth not fetch home again his banished.
2Sa 14:14 For we must needs die, and are as water spilt on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again; neither doth God respect any person: yet doth he devise means, that his banished be not expelled from him.
2Sa 14:15 Now therefore that I am come to speak of this thing unto my lord the king, it is because the people have made me afraid: and thy handmaid said, I will now speak unto the king; it may be that the king will perform the request of his handmaid.
2Sa 14:16 For the king will hear, to deliver his handmaid out of the hand of the man that would destroy me and my son together out of the inheritance of God.
2Sa 14:17 Then thine handmaid said, The word of my lord the king shall now be comfortable: for as an angel of God, so is my lord the king to discern good and bad: therefore the LORD thy God will be with thee.
2Sa 14:18 Then the king answered and said unto the woman, Hide not from me, I pray thee, the thing that I shall ask thee. And the woman said, Let my lord the king now speak.
2Sa 14:19 And the king said, Is not the hand of Joab with thee in all this? And the woman answered and said, As thy soul liveth, my lord the king, none can turn to the right hand or to the left from ought that my lord the king hath spoken: for thy servant Joab, he bade me, and he put all these words in the mouth of thine handmaid:
2Sa 14:20 To fetch about this form of speech hath thy servant Joab done this thing: and my lord is wise, according to the wisdom of an angel of God, to know all things that are in the earth.
King David had listened intently to Nathan as he had told a story and discerned it to be from God.
Joab had hired, what could be called an actor, wise in her words, to tell another story to King David.
Nathan had brought conviction to David and that conviction had led to repentance.
This actor, this imitator, would only lead to the promotion to Joab's scheme of self-interest.
What was her argument?
1) Those that grant mercy should begin with those of their own home.
2) We all are appointed a day to die, if Absalom were to die before he was reconciled by his father, it would his father who would suffer the most and go to his own grave in grief for his own inaction of forgiveness.
3) David was not being an example of the God, he said he worshipped and trusted in.
The results.
*****2Sa 14:21 And the king said unto Joab, Behold now, I have done this thing: go therefore, bring the young man Absalom again.
2Sa 14:22 And Joab fell to the ground on his face, and bowed himself, and thanked the king: and Joab said, To day thy servant knoweth that I have found grace in thy sight, my lord, O king, in that the king hath fulfilled the request of his servant.
2Sa 14:23 So Joab arose and went to Geshur, and brought Absalom to Jerusalem.
2Sa 14:24 And the king said, Let him turn to his own house, and let him not see my face. So Absalom returned to his own house, and saw not the king's face.
King David brought Absalom back home to his own house but there was no reconciliation nor forgiveness.
Joab was disappointed in his King and Absalom became very irritated and would plot to over throw his own father.
What is the theme we should observe here?
The judge, who is also a great sinner, is unworthy to deal with other offenders!
These are the type of men who sit to judge in most of our judicial systems today and ignore the Word of God.
It is only by the Word of God that men can be judged honestly and justly!
When a guilty offender, is lawyered by an eloquent speaker, and is set free, this is in itself a great sin not only to the public but also to God!
God cautions the Church of such things.
1Co 6:1 Dare any of you, having a matter against another, "go to law before the unjust", and not before the saints?
But to most of Israel, Absalom had succeeded where his father the King had failed.
*****2Sa 14:25 But in all Israel there was none to be so much praised as Absalom for his beauty: from the sole of his foot even to the crown of his head there was no blemish in him.
2Sa 14:26 And when he polled his head, (for it was at every year's end that he polled it: because the hair was heavy on him, therefore he polled it:) he weighed the hair of his head at two hundred shekels after the king's weight.
Not only had Tamar been the fairest of all the women in Israel until marred by Amnon, Absalom was considered the fairest of all the men of Israel.
Absalom had a great physique but he had already proved he had no soul!
Absalom had a high spirit and courtly manners to go along with his good looks but lacked in truth.
Absalom make a great happening out of his haircut only once each year.
The "kings weight" would have been the heaviest of the shekel weights.
This hair would weigh somewhere between 6 and 12 pounds depending on what measurements are used.
My own calculations say near 7 and one half pounds and would have been very heavy on him for sure!
And it had now been 5 years since King David had seen his son.
*****2Sa 14:28 So Absalom dwelt two full years in Jerusalem, and saw not the king's face.
2Sa 14:29 Therefore Absalom sent for Joab, to have sent him to the king; but he would not come to him: and when he sent again the second time, he would not come.
2Sa 14:30 Therefore he said unto his servants, See, Joab's field is near mine, and he hath barley there; go and set it on fire. And Absalom's servants set the field on fire.
2Sa 14:31 Then Joab arose, and came to Absalom unto his house, and said unto him, Wherefore have thy servants set my field on fire?
2Sa 14:32 And Absalom answered Joab, Behold, I sent unto thee, saying, Come hither, that I may send thee to the king, to say, Wherefore am I come from Geshur? it had been good for me to have been there still: now therefore let me see the king's face; and if there be any iniquity in me, let him kill me.
2Sa 14:33 So Joab came to the king, and told him: and when he had called for Absalom, he came to the king, and bowed himself on his face to the ground before the king: and the king kissed Absalom.
Absalom was not afraid to resort to destruction to have his own way but Absalom also thought that Joab was on his side.
Absalom regarded himself innocent of any wrongdoing and we can also see that Absalom is now convinced that his father was weak and unable to properly rule Israel.
King David had not realized the bitterness Absalom had toward him and again he was used by his own son, to push forward his evil agenda.
King David reinstated Absalom, giving the appearance to all of Israel that he would be chosen to be the next king.
King David again overlooks Absalom's guiltiness, therefore condoning the murder of Amnon, his own son!
In all these things, King David opens the door for Absalom to be the next king and Absalom takes full advantage of all these things and despises his own father.
And this was the beginning of rebellion and civil war in Israel, by David's own family!
Questions?
Let's Pray!
